You know that moment when you’re holding your tea, your keys, your pencil…and you get up, just for a second, to answer a question, a phone call, or pick up some randomly misplaced item that’s been bugging you…and bam, you cannot find your keys, your pencil, your tea?  You stand there, feeling like an idiot, going “where could it have GONE?  I JUST had it in my hand!”  I’ve been aware of this a lot lately – non-mindfulness – or, what I like to call “throwing to first.”  (I literally call it that.  When this happens to me, instead of going completely nuts, I just breathe and say, “threw to first, there, Sweetie, didn’tcha?”)

 

If you’ve watched baseball more than once or twice you’ve probably seen it.  The shortstop – even a great shortstop, like, say, Brandon Crawford (though perhaps not Derek Jeter…) – goes to field a routine grounder, hoping to get the last out of the inning.  It’s a no-brainer.  He meets the ball, as always, puts his glove down, and because it’s so routine, the completion so expected, he doesn’t make sure the ball is in his glove before he tries to grab it and throw to first base for the out.  He finds it isn’t in his hand, it isn’t in his glove…what the…? He looks down, and alas, it’s through his legs, into left field. E-6 (Error – Shortstop); safe at first; inning not over.

…

 

I live in California and we’re trying to save water.  So I have a bucket in my shower, to collect the cold, non-yet-shower–worthy water as it runs when I first turn it on. Then I get in when it’s hot enough, and use the water in the bucket outside in my garden.  (Gold star for me! Unless…)  The other day, I turn on the shower, line up the stream with the bucket, come back in when the bucket is full and find the water is still cold. I look, and I’ve not turned the tap all the way to Hot.  I simply turned it on and let it run Cold.  No saving water today.  (I only have one bucket.) This incensed me, just the way it has when I’ve “lost” my teacup in the microwave, or my pencil in my shirt, my keys…on the bed, under the last shirt I tried on…just as if I’d blown the final out of the inning and risked a go-ahead run.

 

Then there was this. I cannot stand the pressure of recording an outgoing message on my cellphone.  So I’ve had the same message for 5 years – one that was rather well-liked.   Recently, I got to thinking, I’m a way different chick than I was when I recorded that, maybe I’d best create a new one.  Alas. Apparently now I sound despairing, which is not – according to me, anyway – how I’ve changed.  So the other day, I took the bull by the horns, and when I found myself in a particularly empowered, happy mood, I recorded a new one; played it back.  It was risky, fun, real and sounded like a person you’d like to leave a message for. YES!  Difficult, once-every-five-years task completed.  A day or so later, I thought, let me listen to that again…. “Hi, this is Julia…” came the quiet, despairing voice.  
Never hit “Save.” 

 

A friend shared this theory with me:

One part of your brain is engaged in the “must field this ball as I always do” task, and a whole different part of your brain kicks in when you invite the “if we get this last out, we’ll win!” sort of thought.
So in fact, according to your brain, you are no longer fielding the ball, heating the tea, lining the shower nozzle up with the bucket.  You are inside a grander strategy – and that’s when you lose your pencil. 

Another friend, smiling slightly, said, “Menopause…brain fog.” 

I personally think the increase in such moments has much to do with the constantly multi-tasking lives of beings who are NEVER only doing one thing at a time. Because even my teenaged, always-texting students complain of complete bewilderment at such lost items.

 

No matter what your theory, it’s no fun. And, it keeps you from actually saving water.  

 

So, these days, I’m practicing paying attention to one thing at a time…not throwing to first till I have the ball in my glove.